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JOKES: Religion

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I accidently kicked his head said Buddhist Monk

"I only intended to kick his hand, but I accidently kicked his head," monk Ng Wing-fai told magistrate David Duggan at the San Po Kong Court in Hong Kong.

"Yes, it's true, I did kick him thirty-six times in total, but I assure you that the assault was in no way intentional."

Ng Wing-fai, a thirty-year-old Buddhist monk whose religious vows include the renunciation of violence and of all worldly possessions, explained to the magistrate how the assault had taken place.

"Last Tuesday, I set off from Guandong monastery to take my usual begging position outside the Wong Tai Sin Taoist Temple. Tens of thousands of people had gathered there to celebrate the festival of Yan Yat, and I felt I was assured of a full begging bowl that morning.

Imagine my horror when I reached the temple and found that this man had stolen my place, and was already sitting there, begging.

He was making a fortune and it should have been my money. When I questioned him, I soon discovered that he was not even a proper monk, just a common pauper begging.

At first, I stood next to him with my bowl held out and tried to ignore him, but he kept tugging at my robe and trying to put me off as I begged. That is when I tripped and my foot slipped and started kicking out, due to a nervous condition.

Although I had only intended to overturn his bowl, I regret that he ended up needing fourteen stitches."

The monk was fined $1,000 plus $300 costs, and bound over to keep the peace for a year.